On Love, by poet David Whyte "Life seems to ask us to fall in love in many different ways: with a person, a place, a work, or even, a far-off life we can only imagine for ourselves. In desiring many of these deeper states of belonging and intimacy, none of us are ready for what we have to give up to get what we want. Before receiving our rewards, taking the path of love always has its costs and its vulnerabilities but refusing the path of love also has its steep costs and its equivalent and often demonstrated wounds. Whether we refuse love or risk ourselves in love there is actually no sincere path a person can take without having their hearts broken. We live and move most courageously through life by risking ourselves and by putting ourselves in some peril for a worthwhile goal, a worthwhile person, or a worthwhile life. Love may seem to be always about transactions, for good and for bad, but the exchanges in real intimacy are far deeper, far more disturbing and far more nourishing than we can at first imagine. The transactions in deep love and intimacy are not transactions at all, but a form of alchemy, of melding and of a unification that make moveable and even erase our previous boundaries. This March, join me for a look, through the courageous lens of poetry at what our contemplative and artistic traditions say, not only about surviving but also thriving amidst the costs and often hidden rewards of love." ************************************************************************************** Yes, "a far-off life, a place, a work..." These are all things one can fall in love with. His framing of how we meld and unify so as to erase "even..our previous boundaries" more or less names a lot of how I see my life's journeys. And places have indeed broken my heart, usually because I have to leave them. It also brings to mind how psychologist and author N. Scott Peck frames love in his book The Road Less Travelled, from 1978. It's about opening ourselves to something/someone so deeply we become transformed by it. It could be a past-time like painting or gardening. It could be an intimate partner, or a pet. This is something we must do to fully embrace the human experience. Giving birth, and sitting at the bedside of the dying, being wholly accepting of whatever they need to release, are two of the most human experiences I have had. I've been through both and got profound appreciation for the incredible experience of being human. Melding with "an other", too, leads to powerful growth. I did it with poetry, my child, friends and lovers, nature, and I daresay my cat. ********************************************************************** On the topic of living in another country, it is typical to have moments of frustration and annoyance with the unfamiliar ways of doing things. No one goes to a different country to spend extended time and who doesn't occasionally think "you must be kidding" in response to a cultural practice or scenario such as doing a transaction at a bank. When this happens to me, it doesn't make me homesick so much as desirous of staying inside and avoiding some of the hassles that are encountered. I kind of say, "not today, thank you." I might feel like, Oh my gosh I need to cut this visit here short on one occasion, then the next day I have great experiences and think, I need to check out long term rentals. I think it's common for someone to flip-flop like this when they're already in a transitional period of life. One thing that gets to me is the noise from motorcycles and buses that fill the narrow streets of most towns. Electric vehicles are not happening here! In a way it's balanced out because there's very little use of the landscaping equipment, such as leaf-blowers, that I absolutely abhor and is so ubiquitous in the States. The community I've been staying in has been noisy though with ongoing church services consisting of hours of singing and band music. I can't really describe the style of it; it's not really comparable to anything I can think of. But then this morning I wandered out for fresh tortillas and an avocado to have along with some fresh, local cheese that comes wrapped in a banana leaf. A number of tortillerias and tiendas are available in nearly every neighborhood. Part of the fun is being in the mix of the many others also out getting their morning breakfast goods and picking what you think will be the best places. While standing in line for tortillas, some local women started chatting with me in a light-hearted way. Our little conversation involved some laughter and I realized "this" is what everyone needs but doesn't always find in their cities and neighborhoods in the States. Just those few spontaneous moments of connection and acknowledgement, of showing and receiving interest without having to drive anywhere, plan a date, or spend dollars you'd rather not.  The avocado, grown locally, and tortillas together came to $.85. I could have thrown in two delicious eggs for another $.40. Yes, you can buy 12 cents worth of tortillas at a time, or three eggs, or one perfect $.35 avocado. No wonder travelers love it here. Of course, when you're staying long-term you can stock up as normal and I look forward to doing just that at my next Airbnb (which I'll be in for a month). Although I'll be moving one community over this Wednesday, I've really been charmed by the folks here. On my way up the hill late this afternoon, I passed a group of men in their 30s or so whom I noticed were drinking beer. One said "hola" and I responded politely with the standard "buenas tardes" (good afternoon). They all hee-hawed at that (apparently buzzed) and rattled off some things in Spanish in good humor. Was I offended or scared? Absolutely not. There's a time to be concerned and a time to just see things for the simple, harmless expressions they are and not be phased by it. Also, by saying "buenas tardes" in a formal, polite tone, I was reminding them of expectations- as these greetings are a way of everyone acknowledging each other's humanity and acceptance in a community. Without that, what is there to keep the lost or broken in line?  **************************************************************************************Nothing dramatic, just moments and thoughts. I'm only hearing crickets and far away barking at the moment, and so I end to take some time to enjoy it!